Thursdays With Sophie

Thursdays are exhausting, for Sophie and me. We drive the 25 miles to the rink for Sophia's weekly installment of figure skating lessons. In as much as it does require a certain degree of sacrifice, I know I for one draw a much greater return for being a part of this activity. I'm also quite certain that my little ice princess will recall fondly our once weekly rides to and from the rink where we discuss everything and anything. Laughing usually makes up a large part of the ride, that and Radio Disney 1600 AM.

Still it's what takes place once Sophia is on the ice and separated from her papi by an inch of plexiglass that amazes, annoys, and fascinates me the most. PinF is one of very few men at the rink, usually finding himself surrounded by various women talking a whole lot of nonsense. I hear it all; the infidelities, new houses, new breasts, new jobs, divorces, and most any other mundane, and self absorbed subjects you can imagine.

All the while Sophia is constantly looking at me out of the corner of her eye, checking to make sure I'm watching her every move on the ice. I usually blank out these overbearing Gucci wearing suburban complainers by inserting the earplugs and kicking the Ipod, thank God. It's during these times that I'm in my own little world, feeling the chilled air and watching the children--all to a soothing musical backdrop--miles away from some cheesy story of some department store injustice being bandied about the disinterested mothers in my midst.

Of course Sophia knows nothing of these melodramatic events unfolding all around her papi. What she does notice is me. She's constantly looking to me for approval, encouragement, and support. It occured to me today that I couldn't remember the last time I didn't use swearing as an everyday part of my language. Thursdays are no exception. I find myself uttering (under my breath) "shit", or "damn" sometimes, when Sophia might fall. This is all decidedly contrasted by Sophia's utterances of "oopsies", or "whoops" when she makes a mistake. How nice that must be to be so innocent of angry and obscene words. Lord knows I cannot remember when it was that profanity didn't lace my words.

PinF made another observation today as well. As I watched my daughter I realized there is a certain feeling I can only get when watching my child. Almost and indescribale feeling, any parent will know of what I write. Of course you can probably feel the same way about a parent, brother , sister or mate---but I know that when I see my daughter trying so hard to excel and to please me there is a certain sense of protective pride that just comes over you as a parent. This type of feeling lends itself to understanding what your own parents meant, felt, and experienced before you.

So as I sat there today blanking out all that didn't matter to me and focusing in on my little ice skater, I thought of my own parents and how many times they must have had these feelings, either from watching their sons perform on stage, a ball field, or a basketball court. Sophia for her part is as aware of my presence as I am of hers; her reward is my praise, pride and adulation for her. Sure she wants to do good for herself too, but her real joy comes from my happiness, the thing she doesn't yet understand is that my happiness comes from her doing whatever she wants to, so long as she is happy.

Sophia was given her U.S. Figure Skating ID card today. She hurriedly skated over to the glass and slipped it in between for me to hold for safe keeping; I'm not sure who was prouder of who. So on we'll go with our Thursday rountine, it's been 2.5 years with no signs of quitting now, especially since I've seen her grow from a 5 year year-old full of wonder and fear, into an eight year-old full of poise and confidence.


For this I would've driven 100 miles.