A Wedding Tale

PinF was in a wedding the other day. Yep, that’s right I even found time for some marital bliss on this trip, and I couldn’t have been luckier to have been there. As many of you know, English weather can be rather fickle and damp, this summer has been no exception as PinF was greeted by downright chilly, damp conditions upon his return from chilly Denmark. Alas the sun did eventually show and I think with it, about 10,000 city residents to the beach. So did PinF. Upon returning from Denmark PinF had many friends to see which meant logistics and meals out with old friends. One such friend was my old buddy of twenty years BIG Paul Evans. I played football with Paul years ago and he even did a stint in America first at my house and then a year at Edinboro University in Erie.

And so it was that he and his lovely fiancé invited the PinF for a bit of Thai food, a favorite for sure. I had briefly seen the two of them the first night PinF flew into England when he attended a little party as a welcome into town. It was here where I met for the first time his girlfriend of 10 years, Natasha. She of Sardinian and English ethnicity, her beauty was second only to her wonderfully warm and friendly spirit and personality, so PinF was eager to have dinner with these two, besides maybe she had a sister? Kidding---and she doesn’t.

My friendship with Paul is a lot alike my other European friends, it has endured, survived and held steady in the face of impossible odds. Life changes and it moves to different stages, new phone numbers, new adresses. Deaths, marriages, divorces etc, enduring transatlantic friendships are further proof of the wonder of the Internet I guess. Either way he is on my short list of people I care to maintain a bond of communication with. So it was a week ago on Thursday July 26th, 3 days before the PinF is scheduled to return he’s brought into Paul and Natasha’s parlor to hear something. They announced they were doing a sort of eloping, and having their wedding but only inviting their parents and best man/woman and that they would like me to be there? Say again? I thought for sure it was a “wind up” and didn’t really believe it at first. I told Paul and Natasha how deeply honored I was that they would invite me to their day, but that I couldn't say whether or not if I’d make it. Instead I told them I would look into the possibility. Hell PinF had work and a life to get back to. Still I was here now, and who knows when I'd see these friends again?

Long story short I cleared it with work and made the necessary change to the ticket. PinF was in, I’d figured by now that I had come too far after too many years not to make this event if were at all doable---and it was. Of course with each obstacle overcome came more questions/problems. The least of which was what was I going to wear? Again, Big Paul sorted that too. He had secured a typically English double breasted suit in navy blue---and viola!! PinF was in the game. It’s been said by MofC that PinF’s “mushy”, I think not. I’m just a different flavor, you want silly gnome stories and goofy pizza notes with a bare assed tool belt photo you go to MofC, hell I do, he’s light fare, easy on the brain; little concentration is needed to take in his simple tales, still we often need this type of release and diversion so who am I to knock what he does, I'm a subscriber after all. Still to label any one person's web log as something specific is hard. Life irreverant, mushy, funny, sad. So is Chuck's tennis game, but that's another "mushy" post.

Still, readers come to PinF for different reasons. Possibly for my unique insight, or maybe even my wisdom of experience, perhaps readers of PinF can relate to the everyday failures, losses and love often found in these posts. This is a story of real love, real loss, and real tears. So now’s your chance to go look at the Daily Times of blogs and learn who got a DUI in media, Pa., or you can choose to hear the story of a really beautiful day that PinF should never of had the chance of attending but did through the perfect alignment of destiny, timing, and friendships.

As the week progressed it was decided that PinF would be further involved by doing a reading at the service. The "accent" was supposedly going to spice the event up I guess. Still, I was so honored just to be invited, that I was more than happy to contribute in any way the bride requested. It was decided the service would take place in a small town west of Brighton in the country called Lewes, along what’s known as the South Downs, rolling green hills of typical of much of the English countryside, the town itself well over a 1000 years old. The service was to be at St. Anne’s church a Church of England church. It was without doubt the most beautiful day of my stay in the UK, sunny, 78*, no humidity, just a perfect day in a perfect little English town on the downs.

The church was a 900 year old Saxon church, situated on a hill so that when it was built over a 1000 years ago it would be seen for miles around, even by those along the coast. I had jobs in the service so I had to get with the Vicar to discuss my reading, where I was to stand etc. Turns out he was a neat little guy and he was kind of amused by the American as well, and was too eager to tell me he was raised in Baltimore until age 10 because his father had been a teaching Doctor at Johns Hopkins. My instructions given and small talk out of the way I set about photographing this ancient little church and learning more from the Vicar about its history. It’s not often PinF has celebrated anything in any structure 900 years old, let alone a wedding, which got me to wondering just how many people had done “the deed” on this hallowed ground?

The Vicar reminded his American orator that in fact the number would obviously be in the thousands as the Vic explained to me that prior to the church being a Saxon church it was a Norman church for almost a 1000 years? Sweet baby Jesus!!!! As if this wasn’t enough, the Vic then stated that the location of which we stood was a Roman burial ground before the Norman church, making this church in which I stood a location of both religious and historical reverence for 2000 years!!! Wow now that’s some deep stuff, real deep... My next question? Well I think it’s probably obvious by now eh? Have they had any renovations on the church, it looked in remarkable condition? The Vicar, obviously impressed by my astute interest and questions regarding his church immediately chimed back and said “why yes we have renovations and quite recently”, he went on to say “the roof was replaced in the year 1500”, typically cheeky British humor of course, but amazing nevertheless. This just heightened the anticipation and importance of the day. I think I may have even been a little nervous.....

Of course, as with all wedding there was the obvious "behind the scenes" story taking place, and without delving too much into it here, so as to keep the focus of the specialness of the day I will say in provided the antagonistic sub-plot to our two protagonists. All the sweeter it'll seem down the road. As many of us know that the sweetest fruit is often surrounded by the prickliest thorns. This day was nothing if not a living example of familial interference--still the show went on. Where was I? Oh yes, we've all been given instructions and we're roughly 9 wedding party members, one Vicar, 4 choir ladies, and extremely old pipe organist (some said a Saxon), three elderly women from the parish, and four oriental immigrants sitting in the back witnessing. I felt almost as it could have been a BBC show with the characters, subplots, and story.

The Vicar began by addressing all those in attendance and explaining the history of the church, the thousands of ceremonies performed and the fact that none were more important than the one we were about to witness -- Hallelujah brother! He stated as well that it was a "bride's perogative to be late on her day" (she was already 20 minutes behind), as you can imagine the anticipation was building. I mentioned earlier that my friend Paul is referred to (at least by me), as BIG Paul. He stands at least 6 5" and probably goes in the 250-265 range. Big for sure, but the gentle type of big, soft spoken and easy going, just a really nice bloke. His fiance, well she's a fiery Italian girl whose family hails from Sardinia and England, dark and very Italian looking she is the spice to the pot. She's funny, outspoken, loves to laugh joke and is obviously much smaller than BIG Paul. They are truly a match, the kind that at first glance may not seem like it, that is until you've known them for five minutes and you see the way each compliments the other's personality.

Now, leading up to this wonderful day as I stated were many sub-plots uncontrollable by either party, still they might have scared less superstitious people off the day. There suite at the famed Grand Hotel on the beach in Brighton was flooded by a plumbing problem 24 hours before their wedding, the seamtress muffed the dress, and several smaller "incidents", not to mention the upheaval on both sides of the family. Luckily for the Evans', they had a assistant tending tho their needs at the Grand who did an excellent job, Ms. Jennifer Ormond. Now the beauty of a wedding is usually found in the bride her dress and her beauty. And believe PinF, there was plenty of that, plenty I say. So when it was anounced by the Vicar with little fingers that the bride had arrived there was a steely anticipation by in attendence.

From the moment the bride crossed the nearly 2000 year old threshhold of the ancient house of worship she was a vision of stark and contrasting beauty in such an ancient church and it became clear that what the Vicar said was right--that there is no more important ceremony than the one we were going to celebrate on this day, August 1, 2007. Now of course Natash looked radiantly beautiful, as many knew she would. But for PinF the real beauty was in seeing a mountain of a man reduced to tears in an instant. Not taken to too much emotion, BIG Paul was overcome after all the week's drama when he laid eyes on his bride as she slowly marched the ancient and long worn brick floor of St. Anne's church. I have never been to any wedding where everyone was emotional at the same time. Never. The choir had a direct view of Paul's face, and like emotion filled dominoes they all went down one by one, first a slight dab to a hanging tear, then a kleenex wipe, right on to the full hankie blown sobs.

PinF was situated behind the bride's mother and stepfather who were obviously in the moment as well; seated next to him was the bride's brother who tapped on my shoulder, leaned over and whispered "..is Natasha crying?..", I repsonded that I wasn't sure due to my vantage point but that I was.....he got the point. PinF has probably in 44 years been to at least 35 weddings including my own (itself a bit of a tear jerker), and I can say without reservation that this was the most touching, poignant, and beautiful wedding he's ever been to. The English countryside, the cobalt blue skies, the ancient church, the small intimate setting. This was one of the moments of your life where if you're lucky come along a few times in a lifetime, that you are certain you are in the right place, time, and location and that you are truly witnessing something really special.

Afterwards following pictures, the happy couple climbed into their Chitty, Chitty, Bang, Bang convertible and we all went back to where Paul and I met, Brighton to celebrate along the beautiful seafront of the English Channel. It was for me, such a real day, seeing such an old friend not only on his wedding day, but overcome with joy and love to the point of emotion. I'll not soon forget the feeling of sitting there, observing several generations of people, some of whom I'll never, ever see again all in the moment and crying tears of joy. Frame this moment in the ancient church and you have an almost mythical day.

The Evans' jetted off for a honeymoon in the Indian Ocean to the Seychelle Islands on Friday. On the same day PinF jetted off to an almost foreign world himself, America. I was so removed from my normal life, and immersed in to the lives of my many friends in Denmark and the UK that this trip was much more than a vacation, it was more like a mini slice of life, seen from their perspectives. I'm still savoring the day as I write this........