CIRCLES

It wasn't more than a few weeks ago here at PinF that I had mentioned how life was really just a circle of events while quoting from the late Harry Chapin. Life, such as it is, really does present itself as a continual circle of lessons; lessons that are not possible to comprehend until the the child in us becomes an adult. And in the case of an adult becoming the parent, well this is really where you begin to understand the circle, and the true meanings of your childhood are revealed through your own child's experiences. I say this because it really isn't until one becomes a parent that you truly come to understand your own parent's wisdoms, hang ups and truisms; not to mention their insistance on manners, behavior, and dress codes.

Still, recent events had presented to me so many visits to my past; these contacts with my past allowed me to reconcile with my present. The hardest part of my recent ordeal was my separation from my daughter Sophia, yet in many ways this was also quite healthy for her and for me. It was actually like I never left, as we picked up where we left off - the beach, movies, and parks all dotting our weekend activities. Still, I'm amazed by the many circles I've encountered, either through lost friends found, lessons learned, and kindnesses received either in word or deeds.

This recognition of this "circle" was actually illuminated as I sat through "March of the Penguins" with Sophia last night, probably not the best film for a 7 year-old, (she preferred Sky High), but a beautiful film still. It chronicled what a continual circle life really is, and how more than any other animal, (maybe the starfish) the male emperor penguin is an astonshingly sacrificing species with regard to it's offspring. Suffering, starving, and sacrificing for months, all to protect the "egg"...and when it's over he goes his separate way, only to repeat this torture year after year. Talk about a circle.

So the incredible coincidence that has me believing in the circle theory is this: I went back to face my father's mortality and got to retrace my childhood memories. I stood in the principal's office having a perfect summer moment of childhood reminiscances as I casually strolled the hot, empty, halls of Garrettford Elementary school in Drexel Hill. The coincidence? My lifelong friend Tracey McHugh, a regular follower and ardent supporter of PinF, emails me to say she is friends with the current principal Wayne McAllister who also happens to be her neighbor. Weird, real weird. Not but a week before I'm viewing photos of his lovely family on the wall of his office being told by his secretary what a respected and loved administrator he is, then I get an email from Tracey, saying all the same things.

All of this was obviously fated for me. Two days earlier? I'm in the hospital and a nurse administator sees me from outside my father's room, she comes in and asks if I'm Tim Paynter? Turns out this is an old friend from many years ago, who had I not been in Delaware County Memorial Hospital, I probably would never have seen again. My brother Chris during one of his many visits bumped into a third grade friend from Garrettford who is now a nurse, again the circle phenomenon....

In a Yin/Yang sort of way, life has a knack for balancing itself. The words of Joni Mitchell say it best:

We're captive on the carousel of time
We cannot return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game