A Student's Pride

I write often about how the experience of parenting often allows a glimpse into your past­. Specifically, your childhood, and the many memories that get lost somewhere between birth and adolescence. Because in life, all things are circular, all experiences are shared, and for the most part much of what we did as children our parents have already done; and conversely our children will do also. It’s just the way of the world. This commonality of experience is also what provides all parents with their intuitive powers. As quite often we are able to pick out circumstances and results with a fairly good degree of predictability, based entirely on our own experiences. How many of us haven’t been admonished as kids how we can’t fool our parents­because they were children once?

This is where PinF found himself this morning. I felt like a sort of child Psychologist as I watched 1000 children from grades 3 thru 5 file into the cafeteria/auditorium of my daughter’s school. The advantage of Florida is that almost all school assemblies are held outside due to the weather’s accommodating nature. Today would be different, as we were forced inside for this event due to rain, further magnifying the noise ten-fold. Still I wasn’t complaining, I would have gone anywhere to see what I was here for today. To watch the dynamics of this many kids is quite a study in both anthropology and psychology. You can see the extroverts, the introverts, the cliques, the athletes, the nerds and the cool kids. Kids in groups tend to behave much differently than in one-on-one situations. Funny, as I thought to myself that I hope Sophia is as nice in school, as she is out….I dismissed this thought, of course she is.

So here I was, hiding from my own daughter in her school on a rainy Tuesday morning, her mami was there too. It's not often we’re brought together to do things, but when it’s our daughter, there exists a certain level of détente. Good for Sophie and good for us that we can be there together for her. Usually any underlying issues get left outside the school and we’re able to revert back to the three of us, at least for our daughter’s sake. Today was a special surprise. None of the 1000 students in attendance had any idea who was to be called up on stage by the principal to receive the coveted Student of the Month award for their individual classes, a high honor indeed. Each month, all teachers nominate one student for the monthly ceremony, and bless her little heart---Ms. Sophie was chosen as her class’s representative. Hence our hiding---for if a child sees their parent in attendance, the gig is up and they know they’ve been chosen.

I was prepared, camera in hand ready to capture a “moment” in time. For even though I know there will be a thousand more moments, this knowledge did little to diminish the importance of this moment­ in the here and now. We watched as the third grade nominees were called up one by one to receive their certificates and have the SofTM pin pinned to their uniform lapel. Steadily, like the spelling bee of last year, Sophia’s moment approached and with it, the tension and excitement her parents felt. Until finally the principal called out SOPHIA PAYNTER and ever so confidently and cute she rose, with an almost surprised, though surely happy look on her face to finally win the honor she had coveted since third grade. She strode towards her parents not knowing we were here, and then she caught my eye and smiled a nervous, knowing, and almost self conscious smile. By this point her mami was wiping her tears and I was shaking, as I tried to steadily record the moment on my camera.

As she walked back off the stage back to her seat I gave Sophie a little card of congratulations. In it I told her I wasn’t so much proud of the SoTM distinction as much as I was for her being such a good person. Grades can be attained through hard work, races won through practice, instruments mastered through lessons. I told Sophia you can't be a nice person if you really aren’t one to begin with. And she is. She’s a good kid who considers others, knows her manners, and tries her best, to be her best, through her studying, hard work, and her caring for others. I told her I was proud of her but mainly because of her pride in herself, something that no one can teach, nor ever take away from her. So that was PinF’s Tuesday in paradise, a moment in time yes - but not one I’ll soon forget because she understood exactly what I was telling her.

All the accolades in the world would mean nothing, if she wasn’t a good person, comfortable with who she was and where she was headed. And she is, and this is what makes me proud.