Holiday Heartache

33 months ago PinF arrived in his present neighborhood with all the baggage that goes along with a major life change. Not an hour into my residency I was met by a goateed man who appeared to be in his mid-seventies who proceeded to lecture me about my late buddy Peabody's independence. Apparently my twenty pound Maine Coon's wandering proclivities irked my "nosey" neighbor, and he let me know to keep my cat in check. I remember bridling my words mainly due to his age, though annoyed all the same that his first words were not those of welcome, but rather of complaint. An onerous beginning at best.

Of course life is never that clear cut or obvious. You have to scratch the surface to find the real diamonds of life, something that in retrospect couldn't be truer. Turns out my neighbor was just a gruff guy, not exactly schooled in personality endearment. I met his wife one day and offered to carry her groceries and from that point on things only got better, which is kind of ironic since things for me personally kept getting worse. First it was the hurricanes that almost blew my abode down and left me without power for 8 days, and then on the heels of this my father's auto accident that would set into motion six months of decisions, eventually resulting in my father's death. By this time Don was emotionally invested in me and checked in on my well being often.

Oddly enough, or shall I say coincidentally, we both came to discover that we had more in common than either of us could have imagined. I saw my neighbor Don in a Phillies hat one day during the power failure period and we got to talking, and to my surprise it turns out Don too was from Philly-Springfield to be exact. From this point on Don I always talked sports, Philly, and news. We became really good friends, he followed my father's illness, offered to help me in anyway possible whether it be feeding my cat, to collecting my mail, whatever he could do -- he wanted to. His wife Doris was a real nice neighbor too, always chatting to Sophie and asking her about her new kitten after Peabody passed away. Turns out, Don and Doris are cat lovers too, and have 3 huge cats, so his initial remarks were based upon his fear of may cat messing with his. Little did he know Peabody was the original feline pleasure sponge of inactivity an laziness.

Don, I come to find out, is actually 81, and a hearty 81 at that. We always rap sports when we see each other, he's now a Dophins fan after so many years in Florida so of course I chide him on jumping ship on our boys back in Philly. About a week ago I was on my way out and bumped into Don and we had our usual small chit chat and I very casually asked, albeit rhetorically, how he was doing. What came out was the type of answer that you're never quite ready for, nor even know how to repspond to when presnted in such an innocuous manner. Don told me as his eyes filled up that he had just been diagnosed with esophagal cancer, and that he and Doris were reeling from the news and trying to formulate a plan of treatment. I was stunned, and he was near tears even telling me. He's old school, and he quickly recovered and said he had to get moving to a doctor's appointment.

I'd been thinking of Don since he told me the news, and noticed I hadn't seen him as much lately, that was until this morning when I went out to my car and bumped into Don again. He looked a bit gaunt and ashen though his spirits seemed a bit better. I was bit better prepared this time and asked how it was going and if he had made a decision regarding the treatments. He had, but he acknowledged he was scared as hell, this was unsettling and I let him know that I didn't want to intrude but that I was here for he and Doris. I told him, anything I could do whether it be taking out the trash, driving he or Doris anywhere--anything, they need only tell me and I'm on it. My words felt hollow as I looked into his gray face and welled eyes, for I knew his thoughts were much deeper and much more distant than my offerings.

So here I was, again with a man on the verge of tears with nothing more to offer than simple friendship and suportive words. He shook my hand and thanked me. I drove away to the car wash, taking special notice all the beautiful things around me that I take for granted everyday. The palm trees, the big low lying puffy clouds, and the rising new day sun. My worries of a lonely holiday and petty concerns all in check now as I drove along to the drone of 24 hour Christmas carols on the car radio. I suspect things will happen rather quickly, though I hope he beats it, though he and I both know what lies in store. So it's Christmas, a time when emotions run deeper, though for Don and Doris this would be an understatement. For what it was worth I invited Don and Doris to Christmas Eve mass, figuring they could probably use a little diversion while I explained Sophia is an angel in the production of the childrens mass, and that he and Doris might get a kick ouf of seeing her.

Of course I was thinking of the prayer side of the equation and I think he got my point.